Back in Utah

Surprise!!! We are back in Utah as of Monday night. It was a surprise to us as much as it was to all of you. We knew that the insurance had approved the transfer to Primary Children's in Utah but we weren't sure when it would happen. The social worker had initially told us Monday or Tuesday but after talking with the doctor Friday night we didn't think it would be the first of the week. Well, come Monday late morning the social worker tells me the medical jet is getting ready to come down. We were a little surprised and shocked and definitely not prepared for it. We had suitcases at my parent's house we needed to get, Zach had no flight booked (I got to ride on the medical jet with Dakota), it was just a little stressful but we knew this is where the Lord was leading us to. In the beginning when the insurance approved this the social worker admitted it was in God's hand because this rarely happens. When the nurse came in to tell us the jet would be coming she was in disbelief herself and said this never happens on a Monday morning. Zach was able to get a flight and we landed within ten minutes of each other. Everything was just working out perfectly. Our prayers were being answered right before our eyes. We had been praying that we would be able to move forward and be able to be in the best place for Dakota and the answers just came so quickly I didn't even have time to digest them.  

It was a really emotional day for me that whole day and the next. It was weird how torn my heart was. Of course I wanted to be closer to home and most importantly I wanted Dakota to have the best care he could but it was, in a weird way, hard to leave this hospital, where we had gotten to know the nurses and doctors there so well. They had an INCREDIBLE picu team there and each and every one of them were so great to us and Dakota. They become our friends over those 3 weeks and even though I knew that they would have great people here at Primary's it was hard to say goodbye to those who knew Dakota so well. The hardest part of it all was saying goodbye to my family. My mom and I had a good bawl session together as we sat holding Dakota's hands, waiting for the medical jet to arrive. I couldn't hold back the tears if  I had wanted to.

His last day there...he finally got to wear some real jammies!

Goodbye Nana and Papa...we will miss you!

So comfy and cozy in his nana's arms

Look at both of their eyes...so serious and thoughtful! :)

Dakota did such a great job on the trip...he even took a little nap. It was an interesting little ride that of course I had to document so that he can see what a cool thing he got to do when he gets older. Not every kid gets to have their own personal jet! :)

Lifeflight team getting him all ready to go.

Getting in the ambulance to take us to the airport.

There it is!

Loading him up...so carefully...I was making sure of it! :) They were so cute to him and me. What a great team they have!

Inside the plane.

Since then, I have pulled myself together a little more and the people here have been so amazing and helpful in ways that the PICU there could not. The PICU's job was to get him stable and ready for rehab and they did a great job of that. Here they are specialized in brain injuries and rehab so they have a wealth of knowledge to share. I feel the comfort of the Lord and know that this is where Dakota needs to be. We have already learned so much about his needs and care due to his brain injury that we had no idea about. The medical teams here have been on top of everything since we have arrived and I can't even count the number of people that are involved in his care.

At this point they are not sure if he is ready for their intensive inpatient rehab program yet but they are still evaluating him over probably the next week or so to see where he is at, what he needs, and to prepare us for his care if we end up going home instead of staying in the rehab. So we are still just taking it one day at a time. The rehab team comes in every day to work with him right now and they are SO incredible. We have appreciated their helpful feedback and their extensive knowledge.

There is still no black and white picture of how Dakota will recover and how fast any of it will be. The medical team here is reviewing all of his information and the areas that have been damaged so I'm sure we will get some more info at some point. We have learned though, that with all brain injury's no matter what they are, it is still individual for each child. So, as always, it is in the Lord's hands and it will ultimately be His decision. So we will continue to pray that His healing hand will be over Dakota's little brain and that He will continue to lead and guide us every step of the way.

His new room (only for a day). He stayed one day in this PICU room until they moved him into the neuro trauma center.

We are doing good though and despite this freezing cold weather that welcomed us home, we are glad to be back. We went home last night for a few hours for the first time in a month while Doug and Vicki stayed with Dakota and it was nice to have a home again. It was hard to go into Dakota's room and bathroom and not see his cute little self there with us doing ALL the cute things that he does. There are times like these when the tears just come and we miss him even though he is physically here with us. It is hard to explain the feelings that we have and the emotions that just come. Words cannot express the gratitude that is in our hearts for the miracle our Heavenly Father provided us by keeping Dakota here with us but at the same time, all the memories we have with him are right there and it is hard not to have that same little outgoing boy doing all the fun things he used to do. I am grateful for my Savior and his loving hands that bear us up when we have those hard moments. The hard moments come for a moment and then they go because of His love and sacrifice for us. Although it doesn't really feel like Christmas to us right now because we have no time to think of it, my thoughts are constantly turned to my Savior and my love for him and his life has grown dramatically. So, in a sense we are celebrating Christmas for what it truly is this year.

Please keep Dakota in your prayers...and maybe we will get ourselves our own little Christmas miracle (although we already have). We would love to see all of our friends and family but unfortunately right now with the flu/rsv season they are limiting visitors as much as possible to immediate family. Also, with Dakota's condition they don't want him to get overstimulated while his brain is still recovering and trying to heal. So even if we go home it still may be awhile before we are able to see everyone. Although we would love to see all of our friends and family, our primary focus is on Dakota and his recovery so we will do whatever it takes to give him the best chances for a full recovery. So know we will be thinking of you guys and we continue to appreciate all the love, support, and prayers that you offer in our behalf. We are still fighting and I know Dakota is too.

He has began to show emotion and have moments where he looks like he wants to burst out crying. The first time he did it I was so sad to see him sad but at the same time so happy to see ANY type of expression of emotion come out of him. Since that first time, he has began to do it more often to where he does it several times a day depending on what people are doing to him. They are happy/sad moments for us but it is progress nonetheless. We continue to rejoice with every tiny miracle!

My moment I needed most! He fell asleep in my arms...when I was having one of my hard moments! I LOVED it!!!!

We continue to thank all of you for your prayers for Dakota. I hate to ask any more of you...BUT...there was this precious little 3 year old girl named Fernanda that came into the hospital in AZ a few days before we left with a strain of Meningitis that almost took her life in one day. She was right next door to Dakota and she was going through SO much! She is fighting for her life and a hard recovery from this deadly infection and her family was SO sweet. My heart literally broke the day she came in and I saw her cute mom crying in the waiting room. Everything we went through flooded my mind and heart and I wanted to take this pain away from this family. They were praying for Dakota as we prayed for their little girl...so please if you could pray for Fernanda too!

We love you all so much!!