Dear Navy,

You are 39 weeks and 3 days in my tummy right now

…which means you could be in my arms any day now!! I can’t believe how fast the time has flown from when we first found out you were coming and were as tiny as a poppy seed to now!!

Our love for you has grown EVERY single day and my heart could burst right now with how much love I have for you and I haven’t even gotten to see your tiny face or hold your little hands!

We are so excited, nervous, happy and scared for the day you come into this world!! It has taken your dad and I a long time to feel like we could bring another little person into our family after Dakota’s accident! We still aren’t sure how everything is going to go and how we will do it…BUT we know Heavenly Father told us it was time and because of that we have faith that all will work out and that you will be a HUGE blessing in our lives!!

I sometimes wonder if I know how to be a mom anymore to a healthy child. I have gotten to be a pretty good mom to a brain injured child…blending meals, cleaning and changing trachs, suctioning, therapy, diapers, etc. BUT sometimes I fear I won’t remember how to be a good mom to you. I hope that you will be patient with me as I try to be the very best mom I can to you AND Dakota!! I will have to relearn a lot of things! Physically I might get exhausted and lose my patience at times but I hope that you will understand!!
Navy, I won’t always be the perfect mom but I hope that I will find a way to teach you the things that are most important in this life. It has taken your mom a lot of years and tears to learn some of these things that I hope I can teach you while you are just a little girl!! Dakota has taught me SO much in his short 5 years of life about a lot of these things!! Because of him, I know I will be a better mom to you, then I ever could have been without him!!

Before I had Dakota and as he was just born, I wanted so bad to teach him to be the smartest kid, the most talented kid, politest kid, the best at sports kid, and of course the cutest. Now I realize that (except for the politest) I don’t care if you are ever ANY of those things! You will learn your ABC’s one day…I will never stress about teaching you that! If you never ever are able to catch a ball or be the best dancer on the stage…I won’t even bat an eye about it!

All I hope and dream for you is that you have a HUGE heart that knows how to love!! I hope that I can teach you to love EVERYONE no matter who they are, what they have done, or what they look like. That you will love and serve others as your Savior did! That you will NEVER treat anyone unkindly or judge another! I want you to have compassion in your heart even while you are young. I want you to be the kid that stands up for someone being made fun of, reaches out to someone who is sad or lonely, or gives a hand to someone that has fallen down! I want you to KNOW what compassion is and feel it in your heart…even when you are only 3!! I want to give you opportunities while you are just learning to walk to love and serve others! I won’t ever shy away from sharing the difficult things that are going on around us in fear that you are too young or it might scare you! I want you to know that there is SO much heartache in the world…not to bring you any fear…but to teach you what an important part you can play in helping ease the pain in others hearts!!

I want you to know where you came from, who you are, why you are here, and where you want to go!! I want you not to just learn and memorize the words to I am a Child of God but I want you to REALLY know what they mean!! I want you to know who God is and how important he is in your life!! I want you to live every day for Him and be the daughter of God He designed you to be!! Navy you and every person that comes into this world has an unlimited potential to be something AMAZING!! But only your loving Heavenly Father who is sending you here to me can help you to see and know the potential that is inside of you!!! I hope that you will learn at a young age how to pray and come to him to seek the guidance that I know you will need…as I have needed it…to help you on your journey back to him!!

I wonder how I will be able to teach you all of these things…I know it is a lot to learn! But I know that this is what I will focus my daily efforts on and I know Dakota will play a HUGE part in helping you to learn all of this as well!!

Navy, our family is a lot different then others. You will grow up and find that out as you go to friends houses. You will see that your brother is different then most and your Dad can’t do some of the same things other dad’s can do. Many people have told me you are so lucky to come into our family…you may wonder if that is true when you see all the challenges that you have to face on a daily basis with our family that other kids don’t…BUT I hope that one day you will see how those challenges are really blessings and that you are a pretty lucky girl!

I hope that you will love Dakota with ALL your heart!! I hope that when you look in his eyes and see his sparkly smile that you will see pieces of heaven and that they will remind you of where you came from and where you hope to go someday. You will have to be really careful, helpful, and patient with Dakota and sometimes you may wish that you had a “normal” brother that could wrestle and play with you BUT I hope that you will one day see how lucky you really are to have an angel right in your very home. If you let him, he will teach you the things that are MOST important in this life!! Not through anything he ever tells you but through his sweet, sweet spirit, his eyes, and his smile. He knows more then your mom and dad will ever know and he can help guide you through this crazy life you are about to live!! I hope that you will feel the love he has for you in his heart and that your love for him will be just as strong…even if you never get to hear his voice tell you I love you…at least in this life!

Navy, your Dad may not be able to always see your beautiful face, play catch with you, or take you for a daddy/daughter date on his own as much as I know he would love to!! But I promise he will ALWAYS love you will ALL his heart and he will give you the world and that is what truly matters!! He will play with you, laugh with you, cry with you, protect you, hold your hand (a lot!!) and be your biggest hero! He will be the best example you could ever have as you grow up and start to wonder what kind of guy you want to marry!! I hope that you will always be patient and helpful to him!! He will need you to be his helper sometimes…he will need you to be his eyes at times to help him do things. I hope that you will have a loving, serving, and happy heart and that you will find so much joy in the time that you get to spend with him!!!

Navy…we LOVE you SO much! We can’t wait to see your beautiful face, hold you in our arms, and give you all that we have to offer…which to the world may not look like much but if you could see in our hearts it is so much!!
I know your Heavenly Father is preparing you right now…whenever you are ready we will be here waiting!!!

All our love,
Mom, Dad, and Dakota

32 Weeks…C-section or VBAC

I have to thank ALL of you who have been voting and sharing to help us win Dakota a bike!!! I was so humbled to see how far and wide this has gone and how many votes our sweet little Dakota has been getting! It means SO much to us that people care enough to want to help!! So thank you, thank you!!!
Unfortunately this has been a lot tougher race then I ever imagined!!! Dakota right now has 6,770 votes…that is a TON!!! He was in the lead yesterday for first place but today he is sitting in third by 600 votes!!! Holy smokes!! This is going to be a tough battle! ;) So…if you haven’t voted or shared with your family and friends please do! We honestly need EVERY vote we can get!!! The contest goes until the 26th so there is still a lot of time to share and vote and keep making a dent!! I shared the link on my facebook and instagram so if you are on either of those and want to share from there that would be awesome too!!! Here is the link once again to vote and share!!

Of course we would LOVE to win this but we will be so happy for whatever kid wins! ;) I kinda felt like my niece and nephew did when my sister showed them the website and all the kids…they said, “I want to vote for all the kids because I want all of them to get a bike!” As I have looked at the pictures of all of the kids in the running I want them all to have a bike too! They are all such angels and so darn cute!! ;)
Anyways…thank you for ALL of your love and support in this!! We can do this!! I won’t give up until it is over!!! ;) You all are the best!!!

So holy smokes this pregnancy is flying by!!!! I don’t know where the time is going because it doesn’t seem to be on my side! I feel completely unprepared for a baby to come in 6-8 weeks! What?! I feel that Navy is much more safe and easier to take care of in my belly so I think she should stay there for awhile longer! ;)

 
30 week pic!

I am beginning to enter into the big and awkward stage! Where every morning when you go to get dressed your like…what in the world am I gonna squeeze into today?!

Snuggling, holding, and carrying Dakota is more and more harder and awkward but still manageable. I just can’t hold him standing up for quite as long. My mom bought me one of those pregnancy support belts…which totally makes me feel like an old lady when I where it but I love it! I think it helps a lot!!!

I am still working out and running although I would call my running more of a fast paced walking speed. I am SOOO slow!!! It kinda drives me insane but I just keep reminding myself I’m carrying a lot more weight it’s ok! ;) I quite bringing my watch cuz I don’t even wanna see how slow I am anymore! ;) The hardest part about running is the feeling of having to pee every half mile!! By the end I’m taking small steps just to keep from peeing my pants!! Then when I finally go to the bathroom hardly anything comes out…it’s just the pressure of this little girl in there!! ;) Good times!!


We just had my our 32 week appointment with the doctor and finally talked to her about the pros and cons of doing a VBAC or C-section.. (A VBAC is just having a vaginal delivery after a c-section…it is kind of complicated) I have been pretty set on wanting to do a VBAC for several reasons. 1. Dakota’s was an emergency c-section due to his high heart rate, not due to me not progressing with labor which means we probably could have had a normal delivery. 2. I want to experience a normal delivery. I want to know what it’s like to have a baby the “right” way. 3. Probably most important to me is the recovery. I actually didn’t mind the recovery after my c-section that much but this time around is much different. I now have a 36 lb 5 year old boy that needs my attention and care and if I had a c-section I wouldn’t be able to lift or carry him for 3 whole weeks instead of 1. Now I know my family will be all over to help and that I won’t have to worry about it but it’s more my desire to want to lift and carry him. Our whole world is going to change when this baby comes and I don’t want him to feel like I don’t want to hold him anymore or anything like that. I’m still his mom and I want to be there for him!!!

So going into the appointment I was all for the VBAC. After talking to my doctor about the pros and cons and risks I am starting to question myself. The risk of the VBAC is that the scar where your c-section is can rupture during labor and tear the placenta. There is only a 4% chance of this happening but of this 4%, if this happens there is a 2% chance that your baby could die or have brain damage. As soon as I heard the words brain damage come out of her mouth my heart sank and that is when I began to doubt. Before Dakota’s accident I probably wouldn’t have batted an eye to those chances but now really knowing what brain damage really is…I look at those percentages A LOT different. They may sound slim to none to most people…but pretty much everything that has happened to our little family the chances of those were probably slim to none. We usually fall on the bad percentage side of things! So I just don’t know if that is a risk I can afford to take!!

Of course there are risks to a c-section too. It is a surgery so any time you do a surgery there are risks. But all of those risks are more to the mother and not the baby and that sounds a lot better to me. Zach on the other hand…doesn’t want any risks on me so he is more for the VBAC but I feel more comfortable with taking the risks then the baby!

It is such a tough decision…one we will obviously be praying a lot about before we decide. But I would LOVE to hear any feedback from any of you if you have any!!! Any good/bad experiences with either?? What you would recommend?? Or maybe what your doctors have told you?!

100% Girl, Meet _____!!

A few weeks ago we had our big ultra sound at Mckay Dee Hospital to make sure everything was looking good! Our doctor sent us to the hospital this time around since Dakota was born with a heart defect so that they could look even closer to make sure the same thing wasn’t going on.
Even though I have prayed my little heart out to Heavenly Father to help me have no fear with this pregnancy…I was still a little bit nervous to go. I guess I have gotten used to getting bad news so I feel like I am always prepared to hear something bad.

BUT it was such a relief to see all of HER little body parts and organs moving and working just as perfectly as they should be. They did say that if she had Dakota’s same heart condition (which it isn’t genetic so the chances are slim to none) that it could show up later on BUT as for right now it was beating perfectly normal!! We couldn’t have been any happier and I left with such a huge smile on my face!




I was also of course excited for them to point out her little girly parts so I can know for sure it is a GIRL!!!

YAY!! We are SO SO excited about this! Even though I would have totally been happy either way…and I’m not just saying that…it has been WAY too much fun looking at girl clothes and thinking of life with a daughter! And in the back of my head I guess I have always felt like Dakota needed a sister to love on and care for him. ;)

We have already picked out her name…NAVY!! We love it and love her SO much already! We had 4 girl names that we loved but in the end we chose Navy. We have always loved the name Jade ever since we had Dakota so I was pretty sure her name would be Jade. But then before we were even trying to get pregnant Zach started liking the name Bentley. I really like that name too but I just didn’t think Bentley Friedli flowed and I was still feeling Jade. As we both went back and forth with these two names I heard the names London and Navy and all of the sudden those were the two names I was torn between. Zach liked them both and so we just sat on them for awhile.

Then one morning Zach woke up and out of nowhere said, “I think it should be Navy.” I of course loved them both but when he said that it just felt right. So…unless something crazy happens before she is born I think we can officially say, MEET NAVY!! ;)

These ultra sound pictures are still so unreal to me! It is crazy how much they can see. They still look a little alienish to me but I think she is just adorable already!! She had her cute little arms up by her face most of the time so this is the best we got!

I am 24 weeks right now and feeling GREAT!!! I am passed the completely exhausted and tired phase and I am getting bigger for sure but not so big yet that I am completely uncomfortable, so I am enjoying this phase right now! Time is flying by though!! I remember with Dakota feeling like he was NEVER going to get here but this time around it seems like she is coming way too fast!! I am completely happy that I get 40 weeks to prepare myself but it seems like it is all happening really fast and she will be here before we know it!!

This is me at 21 weeks…it’s about time for another pic! ;)

I always feel like such a nerd getting a picture of just me!!

I started feeling her little kicks at 17 weeks, which was quite a bit earlier then Dakota. They have gotten stronger and stronger every week. She is a strong little girl and she moves a lot more then Dakota used to. Zach thinks that means she is going to be hyper…I kinda hope he is wrong! ;/

I don’t really have any strong cravings or things I can’t stand but I do tend to crave more then normal (which normal is a lot for me anyways) chocolate chip cookies and doughnuts. Those are two things I loved before I was pregnant but now I LOVE them! ;) Especially if I’m anywhere near a Paradise Bakery…there chocolate chip cookies are to die for! ;)

We are still so excited and nervous about this little girl! We know she will put a major spin on our little already crazy world but we know she will bring us a lot of joy too!

It Is A….

Well… the verdict is is kind of out…only 75% sure it is a girl! I love my doctor cuz she is good at what she does but she is ALWAYS in a hurry! ;) Which also means we never have to wait very long for our appointments which is nice! So when she came in she said we got to get it to move so we can see. She wiggled the thing on my belly. Said he/she is not cooperating. Tried again real fast. Tried a third time and she barely moved and she said I don’t see anything there but she isn’t cooperating very well. My guess is about 75% chance it is a girl but we will have to double check next appointment!

In my head I was thinking wait…just give it a minute…she is destined to move. But I know how quick my doctor is so I knew my shot was over.

So…I’m gonna go with girl for now. Do some black Friday shopping for this little girl but keep my reciepts in case she turns into a boy in a few weeks! ;)

So I wanna know…where are the best places to shop for girls??  Online or stores?? Places with good deals and places with just dang cute stuff? I am SO clueless since all I have looked at for the last 5 years is boy stuff. I feel a little overwhelmed thinking about all the things for girls! And my wallet isn’t cooperating with my desires! ;)

BOY OR GIRL?!?!?!?!

One trimester down…2 more to go! ;) I am 15 weeks and my next appointment is this Thursday and I will be 16 weeks on the dot. My doctor thinks we should be able to tell what gender it is and I am SOOOOOO excited. I really can’t stop thinking about it. Even though I don’t care, I am dying to find out!!!

My girl name list I love keeps growing…I am up to 4 names that I ADORE!! Boy names are still stumping me. I do have one I love but Zach didn’t so who knows?!

My belly is growing for sure. Just last week I got home from my morning workout and Zach was getting ready for work. He looked at me (and I wasn’t even wearing a super tight shirt) and goes “WOW…you REALLY ARE pregnant!” So when your blind husband finally notices your belly then you know you are getting big! ;)

So I took my first baby bump picture right then to document that moment…when Zach finally believed we were having a baby! ;)

Just remember this was taken at 6:30 in the morning after a sweaty workout and no makeup. Scary I know but I had to document that moment in time! ;) Plus it’s a rare occasion lately that I actually get ready so a picture of me ready is hard to come by! ;)

I’m still feeling pretty good just still extremely tired. I can’t believe that this little apple (that’s the size of the baby right now! ;)) can suck the life and energy right out of me!! There are some days where I literally feel like I can’t function unless I go take a nap. Then after I do I feel like a new woman. Luckily Dakota is in school for a few hours 4 days a week and still naps most days so I can usually sneak one in when I really need it unless it is a crazy busy day. I think I need one right now just talking about it! ;)

So leave your guess in the comments what you think it is!!! EVERYONE so far has said a girl. I’m guessing girl because Dakota smiled when I asked him if it was a sister and not when I asked him if it’s a brother. So unless he is tricking his mom then my guess is a girl…because I know he knows!! ;)

P.S. Stay tuned for an awesome giveaway coming up this weekend! Doda Wraps are coming at you!!!

We Gone and DONE it!!!

Well…it’s official…Dakota is SO happy to announce that on May 8th he will be the…




AAAAHHHHH!!!

We are so excited, nervous, scared, and thrilled ALL in ONE!!!

When I wrote that post about the question we always get about having a baby, I had no idea it was going to be this soon.

I have always been more ready then Zach but whenever I tried to maybe persuade him it never ended well. So…not saying I gave up, but I accepted the fact that he wasn’t ready and I didn’t even wanna try and convince him until he was the one that was ready. I had NO idea how long that would be but I decided it didn’t matter. It was going to be a tough road whenever we decided to have a baby…so I needed to make sure he WANTED it just as badly as I did cuz their was NO way I was going to even think about trying to do it “on my own idea.”

So one day we were driving in the car (well I was driving ;) ) and he finally said…I think I’m ready to have another baby. I NEED another little voice in my life.

A WHOLE flood of emotions came over me and I was shocked, happy, excited, nervous, and really a little freaked out all in one. The joy I felt from hearing those words out of HIS mouth was indescribable. I really wasn’t sure if I ever would…although I hoped I would.

I felt like we were having a baby at that very moment and that was when I freaked myself out. My mind started racing…this is really it!! Am I REALLY ready for this?! I mean I have wanted it badly but can I REALLY do it?! What if something does happen to this baby like Zach has always worried about?! Could I really emotionally and physically deal with that?! Zach was always my cop out on why we haven’t decided and now that he was in…I needed to make sure I was really in!!

But of course I was…so we started the hunt for some private insurance that had some kind of maternity coverage because the one we were currently on had none. We got all that was offered for private insurances…a whopping $7,500 deductible. But obviously we know things can go wrong VERY easily, so something is ALWAYS better then nothing!!

We got signed up, waited a month to be members, and then I stopped taking the pill! ;)
I had no idea how fast it would be and frankly I was okay if it took a little while. I wanted to make sure we were really ready for this! ;)

I prayed my little heart out to my loving Heavenly Father that He would give us this baby when HE thought we were ready physically, emotionally, spiritually, and all around. I didn’t want a baby until He knew we could do it because He sees the big picture. He knew how hard it would be for us and all that lied ahead…so I put my faith in him and….

Lo and behold…first month this little peanut was given to us!

I truly feel like Heavenly Father was ready for us to take on another one of his precious children but He wanted us to want it and feel like we were ready. Sometimes I even prayed when Zach was being stubborn about it that He would just send us one even though we were taking birth control cuz I didn’t think Zach would ever commit. He obviously knew that wouldn’t be the best situation for us and that WE needed to want this little spirit just as badly as He wanted us to have it!

I feel SO blessed and comforted in knowing He trusts us again to have another!

SO…I am almost 12 weeks along and can really say I have been feeling pretty dang good! I have my tired spells where I feel like I can’t keep my eyes open for one more minute so I indulge in naps more often then I ever have when I get the chance. I went through a blah stage where I didn’t feel great but didn’t feel horrible…usually the nights were the worst. But I have never thrown up so I really can’t complain. I don’t know how all you woman who are so sick all the time do it???!!! My breasts KILLED for about 10 days straight ALL the time and I feel like they grew every day of that. I even got asked if I got a boob job? Nope…just pregnancy. Don’t you think for all that our bodies go through at least we should be able to keep our boobs?? ;) j/k…kind of! ;) I already feel like I’m showing way more then I should at this point. My pants are already feeling tight and I’m a little worried this may be a long 9 months! ;) Is that normal to already feel this big at 12 weeks?? It has been so long (over 5 years) since I was pregnant so I truly can’t remember much about how I felt with Dakota. (This is why you get all these fun details…for my rememberance! ;))

The thing that I am MOST worried about is when I get REALLY big…how I will carry and take care of Dakota. He is already getting pretty big, heavy, and awkward to carry around and when I have a huge belly it will be quite a bit more awkward. Obviously, we will make it work but I am a little nervous.
I am MOST excited about when I get to FEEL this baby inside of me! It will feel SO much more real and I truly can’t wait!!!

Gender you ask?! We truly and honestly don’t care!! We just want a healthy baby…and I mean that more then anyone you have EVER heard say that!!! I am nervous somthing will be wrong but I have tried to pray and put my faith and trust in my Heavenly Father that he will take all the fear from me and help me to focus on the excitement of it all.

I want whatever gender will be best for Dakota. I think a sister might be more loving, sweet, helpful, and kind to him. I also don’t know if we will have another child after this or not. We aren’t making any plans…just take it one at a time. SO of course EVERY mom wants a daughter…so for that reason a girl would be great! Also…we only have girl names that we like right now…not boy names.

A brother would be so fun for Dakota though so he could play boy stuff with Dakota and be his little buddy and protector. And personally…I just LOVE boys!! I LOVED playing boy stuff with Dakota and I just think little boys are the cutest things on the planet!! (it would also save me some money since little girls have WAY too many cute and fun things! ;))

So in the end…we are just plain excited!!!