5?!

My baby is officially a 5 year old now!! How?! What?! It’s crazy to think that I had him 5 whole years ago!


In his short 5 years of life he has taught me some of the most important things I have ever learned! He is truly an angel and the light in my life!! He has changed me forever and I am SO grateful for that! I truly feel it an honor to call him MY son!!

This year his birthday was very fun because I feel like he was actually excited about his birthday for once. Almost every time we would talk about his birthday or his birthday party he would crack a smile. Even though we definitely aren’t the norm, I think that is age appropriate at 5 to finally get what your birthday is all about and really be excited about it!!

As I always say…a birthday is WAY more then just a day…it should be celebrated AT LEAST a week or the whole month really!! So it is for Dakotas as well!!

He started it off with a cousin party. Zach’s mom is so cute and started having a cousin party for each grandkids birthday. We just had Tate’s cousin party since he turned 1. For Tate’s party we went on a family bike ride around Mantua and then a picnic. It was so fun!!! Surprisingly I think Dakota enjoyed it. We don’t own bikes or a trailer so luckily we have some awesome friends that let us borrow theirs! ;) I even got a Dr. Pepper bike!! Couldn’t have been more perfect! ;)



All the cousins! Of course Grammy is SO cute and had them all matching race bandannas!! ;)



Check out that SWEET Dr. Pepper bike! If it is one day stolen from your house Amber…it wasn’t me!!! ;)


 
Just chillin…it’s a rough life when you don’t have to petal! ;)



Nice view…I’m talkin about the one on the right! ;)


  
Then time for a picnic!! Yum!!


For Dakota’s cousin party we had a cowboy dinner in grammy and poppy’s backyard.

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Are they not the cutest grandparents ever!! They went to so much work…each kid had their own western name! ;)

Then we headed over to our brother-in law Beau’s for a horse ride (since Dakota is a cowboy it was only appropriate! ;))Even though Dakota wasn’t feeling great he LOVED it!


Dakota and Uncle Beau…2 cowboys…so happy! ;) Not sure how excited he was about his mustache…but we thought it was cute! ;)



He had to take turns with his cousins…luckily he is a good sharer! ;) Tate and Maelee. (somehow I missed Houston :()


He even got to ride the tractor too! He was in heaven!!!



Then it was ice cream time!! Perfect treat for Dakota man!! He LOVES ice cream!!

So did the rest of the kids as you can see them surround grammy! ;)


I wasn’t planning on throwing him a friend party but as it got closer to time I changed my mind. I decided to throw him a little friend party because he has so many cute little friends that just love him and I want him to feel that love!!

I also think there is something inside of me that I can’t pinpoint…but because Dakota is the way he is I feel like I have to try harder to help his friends see how special he is so that they want to be around him. I know that sounds weird…but I want them to think of Dakota with happy and fun thoughts and I want them to be able to have fun celebrating him!! I want them to see that even though he can’t run and play with them like other kids he is still fun!! (It is so hard to describe but it is just a mix of emotions!)

I threw a big party at the pool for him last year but this year I decided I wanted to keep it cheap and simple. So I decided do a little water party in the backyard for a couple hours. As I started thinking about what to do to make it more fun for kids I decided a Pirate Party would fun…so boy and so perfect since Dakota WAS a pirate for Halloween last year! ;)




The more I started thinking and planning the more and more excited I got about it and it didn’t end up as simple as I imagined it being but it was SOOOO fun and SO worth all the work!!!

It all started with the invitations. I don’t think I am a super crafty and creative person…at least I don’t put myself in that category. I like to make cute things but I’m not the most computer savvy, how to person to do it. I wanted to be cheap with my invitations so I thought for sure I could find something online. There were of course some cute ideas on Etsy but I didn’t want to pay for them so after awhile of searching I thought…I can do this! So I put on my Can Do panties and got to work…they ended up so much more fun and cuter then anything I could have bought!

 

I hand delivered the rolled up ones to friends close and mailed the folded up ones. I wanted to put them in old bottles with sand but I couldn’t find any bottles to use and I was crunched for time.

I wanted the kids to all be able to be piratey so I made headbands, eye patches, and swords!! The swords were taking me forever and I was thinking WHY am I doing this…does it really even matter…after staying up til 1 a.m. getting 1/2 way done with them one night. The next morning I showed them to Dakota and he was all smiles and then I knew it WAS SOOO worth it!!! Just because he can’t talk and tell me what he wants…doesn’t mean he doesn’t deserve the best birthday party ever! ;)


So fancy I know! ;)

Luckily the next night (the night before the party) 2 of my cute friends Jessica and Lacy helped me finish the rest of the swords and cut up all the food so I didn’t have to stay up so late again! Thank you thank you!! ;) It cracked me up though that by the end of the party most of the boys were taking everything off the sword until it was just pipe and they thought that was even cooler…crazy kids!!!

SO…after all the hard work it all paid off! Zach’s mom came up early that morning before the party started and we got EVERYTHING done in the knick of time!!



When the kids walked up they got all of their pirate gear…eye patches, tattoos, headband, and sword. So they were ready to be REAL pirates!!



Drink table…salt water (not really ;) ) and Pirate’s Punch!



Food Table…most important in my book! ;) I just did snacks since it was at 10:30 in the morning!



I think the kids loved the sharks in the jello the most! LOL



Had to have a pirate cake to go with it! This looks a lot more fancier then it really is…I just used the sugar sheets you can buy and cut out all the pieces and slapped them on there! All the kids wanted some of the head! ;)



He had so many of his cute little friends come and love on him and share in his special day!! I think all of the kids had fun too.

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“Baby corner crew!” ;)



Tried to capture everyone but I know I didn’t!!


Dakota totally grinned when these two cute girls wanted to take a picture with him! ;)

Captain Dakota himself!


There were lots of things to do…I tried to think of as many as possible to keep them all entertained! ;)

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We jumped with sprinklers on his new birthday trampoline!!!

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We did the slip and slide…also used as a splash pad for some of the kids who just wanted to walk on it! ;)


Vicki and I attempted to help Dakota down…

Not sure it went so well! ;)

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We walked the plank…


And sat on it! ;)




My sweet friends Josh and Capri let us use their waterslide bounce house…which of course was a hit!!




We shot water ballons with launchers at the kids…but in the end all they really wanted was their own balloon to throw at each other! ;)
 
I wasn’t the best aim! ;)


 


My favorite thing of all though…I had those bath tub crayons for the kids to draw pictures and write Dakota birthday messages on our vinyl fence. I tested it first to make sure it would come off so my husband wouldn’t kill me! ;) It was the SWEETEST thing to see all the kids drawing and all the cute messages that were left for him!


The end result…


My favorite little find!!!


And of course there was ice cream and cake time!!




At the end some of the kids were SOOO excited to give Dakota their present they just started bringing them up to him. I told people that asked not to get him anything cuz I never even know what to get him and he already has plenty but it was SO cute to see the joy that these kids found in picking something out just for him and wanting so bad to see him open it! He got some pretty awesome stuff! Sometimes it takes other people to help me think outside the box of what he might like! Thank you EVERYONE for your sweet gifts!!


Zach was a little overwhelmed trying to help but he did a great job! ;)

Thank you to everyone that came to his party and made his day EXTRA special!!!


Later that night we went to a little fiesta at Zach’s Grandpa Ed’s assisted living home. They had this cute couple come and sing some western music and they even sang to Dakota! It was SO darling!!

Listening with grammy and poppy. He smiled the most when the lady yodeled. Maybe I should learn how! ;)

The day after his party was his actual birthday.



He woke up to some yummy yogurt! ;) Lucky boy I know!!! ;)


The cute Winwards had given him movie passes to see Planes so we decided for his birthday to take him! He seemed to really enjoy it!!

So relaxed and content with dad!! Zach had never been to the movie theatre with him since his accident. I have just been taking him to the summer movies by myself so he was shocked at how good he was during it!!

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Happy Day!! (All people carry their 5 year olds out of the theatre in a chair right?!) ;)

Later that night his cute grammy and poppy came and took him to go get ice cream!! He was a spoiled boy!!!

We still have a family party to come…so the partying is NOT yet over!! Today he listened to his aunts and cousins birthday messages and was ALL smiles! He got sang to in his primary at church…he is loving life! ;)

IT’S GREAT TO BE 5!!!!!!!!
(I secretly wish I was 5 again!! ;))

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY SWEET DAKOTA MAN!!! I LOVE YOU TODAY AND EVERY DAY!!!

BABY LOVE!! Q/A

So we had the wonderful opportunity to FINALLY get to Idaho to meet my new niece Tori that is 7 weeks old!

We had never even been to my brother’s house and seen where they lived although we have wanted to really bad. We have wanted to but it is a 5 hour drive from our house and it’s not really practical for a day trip and it is A LOT of work to pack Dakota’s stuff up for a night so we hadn’t made it out there.
They blessed their baby on Sunday so it was the perfect excuse to finally make the trip. I had been dying to snuggle that new baby…pictures just aren’t the same!!

I love her!!!
My cute parents flew into Ogden Friday and then Saturday morning we hit the road to make the trek up there. It was SO nice to have my parents with us…1. for the wonderful company & 2. so I didn’t have to drive!!!! It was magical just being a passenger again…I took a couple naps, did some reading, and just enjoyed every minute of it! ;)

I got to sit by Dakota and hold hands!!! ;)
There place was gorgeous…lot’s of land…so fun to finally get to see it! Tori was even more gorgeous in person!!
Dakota got to be the very first cousin to meet Tori! I think he loved her!!!

It really shows how big he is!! :( I still think he is my “baby” but obviously he is no longer a baby!!! Boo!!!
I also got to see 2 of my sisters!!!! YAY!! Always a good time!!

You can tell which one is our sister in law…she has height!! I am wearing some pretty decent heels and she is in flats!

All of my family that could make it! Sure love these guys!!
My brother did such a good job on the blessing! He truly is such a cute dad! It is so fun to see him as a dad. Him and I are only 14 months apart so we grew up best friends and worst enemies! We had fist fights, wrestled, laughed, and played together. To see him now as a dad brings out his soft and sweet side and I love it!!!

Such a handsome fell! ;)
Dakota even got to go for a ride with Papa!!
 
Can you see that little grin!! ;)
So on to the Q&A…When (or are we) going to ever have another baby???
I get asked this question ALL the time. Many people are nervous to ask me…others are very forward. I totally don’t mind getting asked this question. It is a legitimate question. Dakota is turning 5 this week…it’s been a LONG time since I had a baby!!!
It is been a roller coaster ride for Zach and I at the thought of having another child. Right before Dakota’s accident I was finally starting to feel that baby hungry mommy urge to have another kid. Dakota was 2 years and 3 months. Zach on the other hand was still struggling with the loss of his sight and the stress of being a blind provider. He also struggled with the thought that if we had another baby now, he would never know what they looked like. I know that might not sound like a big deal to all of you who get to see your precious children’s faces daily but for him it was hard enough to no longer see Dakota’s sweet face let alone another child who he had NEVER before seen. At least with Dakota he knew what he looked like before he went blind and he could picture his sweet face in his mind! SO of course I didn’t want to push the desire I had on Zach when the stress level was already high.
Then, when Dakota was in the hospital I had a whirlwind of emotion. When we were unsure in the beginning if he would live or die…the thought that I might not be a mom anymore literally killed me. I couldn’t fathom the idea that this precious gift of motherhood could so easily be ripped right out of my hands and I could be left with nothing. I was ready that very day to have another child just thinking about it. But obviously in that type of setting nothing of that sort was even close to happening. ;)
As we got home and started to see what the reality of living with a brain injured child was like (that first year was INCREDIBLY hard) the thought of having another child didn’t even have time to enter either of our minds. We were just in survival mode trying to figure this all out and trying to manage cares for Dakota. There would have literally been NO WAY possible to even babysit another child let alone have one!!
Dakota has changed a lot since his accident and now things are feeling a lot more manageable…not easy by any means but definitely better compared to where we have been. He is happier, sleeping better, needs less meds and less total round the clock tending to, etc.
SO…the thought of having another child has definitely been brought up…but there is still a huge roller coaster of do’s and don’ts associated with it.
Zach is still our sole provider and he is STILL blind and that is not changing. Owning your own business is stressful and there are good times and bad so the thought of having to provide for another little person without a consistent income stresses him out. He doesn’t have the luxury that other men have that if it doesn’t go well he can easily find something else…he is blind and limited on what he can do. On top of just the money to care for another kid…being a small business owner means we don’t have great maternity coverage so we would have to come up with a lot of money to even have a kid. We basically pay all the costs and insurance is there if something were to go wrong.
We both have fears that we won’t be able to physically and emotionally handle it. Dakota still requires SO much that the alone time we get is much needed and to throw another child in the mix would make it a lot harder. I fear that being big and pregnant I won’t be able to physically carry and take care of Dakota. I still want Dakota to get all the therapy and attention he so desperately needs and having a baby would make that so hard. I wonder how in the world I will go anywhere with Dakota and a baby. I will probably never leave my house and go insane for the first 2 years of it’s life!! I like taking Dakota to the park and pool and doing normal kid stuff with him because he is a kid but with a baby I’m not sure how I could do it on my own. I fear about the lack of sleep and how I will function. I still get up with Dakota at least once in the night and unlike other kids I don’t think that will ever change. It’s not something he will most likely grow out of, so to continually get up with him and a newborn just freaks me out. I am pretty emotional when I am lacking in sleep.
Zach has the fear that something bad will happen if we have another baby. I don’t blame him…our odds are 2 out of 3! I don’t like to live in fear so I don’t worry about that but I will pray my guts out if we ever decide to and hope and pray that Heavenly Father wouldn’t do that to me!!! But…it will be his plan not mine so who knows!!
BUT on the other hand…we both SO desperately miss the sound of a little child in our home. One that talks and runs pitter patter across the floor and tells you they love you!! Zach is always saying, “I need another little voice in my life.”
I also think that eventually Dakota will really enjoy having a sibling and I want that for him. I think having another kid around would bring him joy and excitement that adults just can’t give him.
I look at our future and see that although it will be INCREDIBLY hard at first I don’t want to miss out on all of the parenting firsts…like playing t-ball, driving, dating, marriage…and of course grandkids. As much as I wish Dakota could give me all of that that he can’t (he give me so much more in other ways) and I don’t want to be old and grey and regret never having another.
I’m also not getting any younger. I’m turning 30 in February and it only gets harder to get pregnant the older you get. So I fear if we wait too long it will be too late.
So…the answer to that question is still not clear. We both still want at least 1 more…maybe 2 or 3…we will take it 1 child at a time BUT we both need to be on the same page about it and feeling like it is the right time and that we can do this because it will for sure be hard! No doubt about it!! So the timing of WHEN that will be is still completely unsure!!

Q & A #2: You seriously dress so cute. I’m curious to where your favorite places are to shop?
First of all…thank you for this incredible compliment!!! I do LOVE to shop and sometimes I wonder if I have issues! ;) I can’t walk into ANY store that has ANY types of clothing without glancing over in my department. FOR REALS! Whether I’m at Walmart or Nordstroms I am looking as I walk whether I mean to or not or whether I need anything or not. Let’s face it though girls…who really “NEEDS” anything!? ;)
I love the difference between Zach and I. Zach literally will not by ANY clothes until ALL of his pants have holes literally in the butt and are now inappropriate to where or until his shirts have holes in them or no longer “fit right.”
Me on the other hand…I think I NEED something ALL the time and you better believe if I see a sale or a “good deal” that TOTALLY means it’s a need…RIGHT?!
No…I’m not THAT out of control but I truly do ENJOY probably more then I should buying clothes/shoes/accessories or whatever. I love creating new outfits and trying new things. It’s like a hobby!! ;) LOL
So to answer your question I literally will shop anywhere! I have had some good finds even at Walmart…not that that is where I do majority of my shopping but I just always keep my eyes open for something that catches my eye.
The places that I can go and guarantee I can usually find something I love are: Downeast, Target, Old Navy, Nordstroms Rack (more in my price range although Nordstroms does have some good finds), T.J. Max, H&M, Forever 21.
I love to shop around local boutiques or stores that have unique finds. If I am in ANY new place I always like to shop around stores I have never heard of just to see what I can find.
I’m not a huge online shopper for clothes since I like to try them on but I have found a skirt and accessories on AndRuby that I have loved.
Hope that answers your question…if you ever want to know where I bought something specific that I am wearing in a picture leave me a comment and I would be more then happy to reply!!