Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Calling ALL angels...Please Help!!

I feel a deep desire to reach out and help our sweet cousins in their great cause to become parents!! Zach's cousin Scott and his sweet wife Stacey have been trying for about 3 years to have a baby. After the doctors told them they would have about a 1% chance to have one on their own they have decided to try in-vitro which is SOOOO costly and not even a 100% chance of working.

I feel anxious to help for several reasons.
1. Because they are our family and we just love them to death! Zach and Scott are the same age and have been buds their whole life. His sweet wife is SO perfect for him and I adore her!

2. My own sister Shana has gone through this same trial and has never had the chance to bear her own child BUT luckily she has been able to adopt 3 AMAZING children. Shana and I our 10 years apart so I didn't really understand and know (since I was in my selfish stage of life) what she was going through during the difficult time of finding out she wasn't able to have kids. Now that I am older, a mother, more mature, and compassionate I have talked with her about how she felt during this time and she said it is VERY difficult. She has explained to me that you go through the whole grieving process as you would a death because you grieve the loss of the ability to have a child.

3. I am a mother and I know how incredible it is to be a parent and I think EVERY person that has this righteous desire should have the opportunity...no matter what it takes!!! I think every woman when she has made the decision to finally have a child has had the fear in the back of their mind wondering if she will be able to. I know I did for sure! What is this was your dream and it didn't come true?? Put yourself in their shoes!

4. I think this kind of trial is a "silent" trial that is often overlooked in the world of trials. A lot of people don't share this type of trial they are having with a lot of people so it doesn't give people the opportunity to reach out and help them. With other trials such as a death, an accident, cancer, illness, etc. people often rally around the people going through the trial giving emotional, financial, and even physical support. But rarely do you see something organized and planned to help someone going through something like this...when really it is no different. It is a trial VERY real & VERY hard!! I am SO incredibly grateful for the love, help, and support that we have received through our trials and want to continue to give that to others!

So when we (and we just found out this week) heard that our sweet cousins have been struggling with this and have decided to try in-vitro on May 30th we wanted to help too!

SOOOO...how can you help?! There are several ways!!

1. They are having a yard sale/bake sale THIS SATURDAY April 27th to help raise money for the great cost of in-vitro. If you have ANYTHING at all you would like to donate or bake please contact me and I will come pick it up or do whatever you need me to do. If you can make it out to the yard sale and come and support them or just spread the word about it to others that would be AMAZING too!!! The address of the yard sale is 209 N 3000 W West Point, UT and goes from 8:30-12.

2. I am donating ALL of my profits starting April 22-May 22 from my spray tanning to them SO come get yourself I nice looking tan since spring is here and support this cute family!!!!

3. If you don't live near and can't do the first 2 or don't have the time you can send  ANY amount of donation to me and I will make sure to get it to them! Anything big or small that you could give would be greatly appreciated. If you can get it to me by May 22 that would be AWESOME!!! Contact me through email (tessie11@msn.com), phone 801-388-8223, or comment and I will get you my address!

If you would like to learn more about their story they created a blog. It is http://scottandstacy09.blogspot.com/

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We are all in this crazy trial of life together!!!!!


  1. Tessie!
    This is my first comment but please know that I've been reading your blog for a long time and I think you're wonderful and it's a great thing that you can express your feelings in this way and you and your family are never far from my thoughts and prayers. You truly are incredible and I feel so blessed to have known you.

    I am not a blogger but seeing how cathartic it has been for you, I think it's something I would have benefited from whilst I was going through a similar thing. But for whatever reason I was too embarrassed or too proud to tell people about the problems I was having and so for the majority of the time dealt with it alone, which was one of the lonliest things i've done. The only person I really talked to was Jordan and even then he was going through a crucial time at school and so didnt want to be a burden on him by talking about it as much as I felt I needed to. So I know exactly what you mean about it being a silent trial.

    Jordan and I tried for over 18months to get pregnant and I know in hindsight that doesnt seem like a very long time, but going through it was the longest and hardest period of my life so far. And I know for a certainty that Heavenly Father knows us all individually and knows exactly what we can bear and I guess at that time I wasnn't stong enough to wait any longer.
    I have polycystic ovarian syndrome and so didn't know when or if I'd ever get pregnant. I had so many appointments with my gp and gynecologists. It began when I didn't have a period for over 6 months and after taking multiple pregnancy tests decided I should see the Dr. She referred me to the gynecologist and after too many internal exams and ultra sounds they sent me for an HSG (hysterosalpingogram) where they took an x ray of my uterus and injected dye to see if there were any blockages anywhere. They saw that I did have a slight blockage on my right side, so as well as not ovulating every month there was also a chance that nothing would get through anyway. I didn't feel great after this, it just seemed to be another thing that I had no control of. I was on the brink of depression, some days were horrible and all around me my friends and people at work were having babies. I couldn't escape it and then my brother called me and told me that his girlfriend had accidentally fallen pregnant. This was almost more than I could bear, I couldn't understand why I wasn't being blessed in this way when Josh who wasn't living his life right had been given the thing I most wanted.
    I spoke to Jordan often and he promised me that I wasn't being punished for anything, that the Lord loved me, was aware of me and would help me. He told me that he was certain it would happen for us as the right time in our lives.
    It turned out the next week I found out I was pregnant and it was the right time in our lives, the baby was due just after Jordan had finished university and a month before he had got a conditional place at the law firm he wanted to work at...

  2. When I had my next hospital appointment they said that it was probably the HSG that had cleared my blockage, which seemed to be a fluid build up. It was a big blessing in my life to have such wonderful Dr's look after me.
    My biggest challenge throughout the whole experience was learning to trust my Heavenly father and his plan for me. I know I was being taught patience and trust in Jordan and the power of the priesthood. I learnt how to pray and after a long time how to listen for the answer , although getting not yet was one of the hardest answers I've ever had to get.
    We now have 2 beautiful daughters and I feel so blessed to have them everyday. But I know that so many other people go through this same trial and so many others.
    I want to help Tessie in whatever small way I can so if you contact me through my email kate.bell@marplehall.stockport.sch.uk then we can arrange some way for me to donate.
    I hope we can see each other again sometime.
    Just to say again I love you and you are so strong. Thank you for sharing your experiences.
    Kate xxxx